“30 Day Vegan Challenge, Day 4.”  *Apocalypse Cow*

"The Fuhrer is a convinced vegetarian, on principle. His arguments cannot be refuted on any series basis. They are totally unanswerable."  From the diary of Joseph Goebbels, Hitler’s minister of propaganda (who, btw, was also a failure as a poet, as so many of us are, but who also happened to hold a PhD in German Romantic literature!).

Until I began this 30 day challenge I was unaware of the many deep doctrinal and ideological differences among vegans, vegetarians, pescetarians, lactos, ovos, and lacto-ovos, etc, and that there were so many levels of practice (and status).  This dialogue from the Simpson episode “Lisa the Treehugger” where Lisa comes under the sway of Jesse, a jailed leader of the environmentalist movement, “Dirt First,” and who has attained the highest level of veganism, seems to sum up a lot of the contentious issues involved:      

Lisa: You do Yoga? 

Jesse: Yeah, but I started *before* it was cool. 

Lisa: My name's Lisa Simpson. I think your protest was incredibly brave. 

Jesse: Thank you. This planet needs every friend it can get. 

Lisa: Oh, the earth is the best! That's why I'm a vegetarian. 

Jesse: Heh. Well, that's a start. 

Lisa: Uh, well, I was thinking of going vegan. Jesse: [chuckles] I'm a level 5 vegan -- I won't eat anything that casts a shadow. 

Lisa: Wow. Um ... I started an organic compost pile at home. 

Jesse: Only at home? You mean you don't pocket-mulch? [takes out pocket stuff for Lisa to feel] 

Lisa: Oh, it's so decomposed! Do you think I could join Dirt First? 

Jesse: Well ... we might have an opening at the poser level. 

Yep, that sounds about right, whether it’s my diet, my art, my poetry, my ‘spirituality,’ I think that “Poser Level” is a fair estimation of my degree of enlightenment so far.

Obliged.