Against Hope

Modestly she turns from the doctor

While buttoning her blouse again

The rain has paused but the long walk

To the bus will still be a cold one

“Do I need to sign anything?”

She asks the receptionist on the way out

“No,” she smiles, “we have all your information

You’re good to go”

She pauses at the doors

The street is gray and wet

So indifferent to the lost color

Gone now for many months

She must have moved forward because 

The doors sprung open automatically

She worried the receptionist saw her start

She looked back but the desk was empty

Head down into the stinging wind

She merged into the busy sidewalk traffic

No one was expecting her anywhere

Cold tears defended her eyes

As the temperature dropped

Slush formed in the gutters

Her feet slapped at the mire

Everyone’s did

At the corner she felt lost

One way the same as another

Other walkers brushed past her

Disturbing the strident babbling flow

Signals ordered her body about

Signs commanded her movements

Channeling and quelling natural instincts

False rituals promising modes of survival

Snow fell in every form it needed to

Clouds took their turn in the sky

She only faced the east because

East is the vantage to the infinite sea

Obliged.

(photo taken at double bluff beach here on whidbey island)